In search of Love…

In the present age of Kaliyuga, the Age of quarrels, it is commonly seen that- 

  • Despite having all riches, person remains stressed individually, family wise and society wise.
  • Despite being in youth, having good looks and wealth, person seriously contemplates suicide.
  • Diseases like nervous breakdown, indigestion, migraine etc. are commonly seen.
  • Divorce rate is on rise.
  • Arguments, anger, quarrels are the usual happenings.
  • Loneliness has become the biggest disease.
  • Even amidst near and dear ones, one feels all alone.

What is the reason behind all these???

 

Hunger of the belly or Hunger of the heart ?¿?

It is often said that ‘Hunger of the belly’ is the only problem of the world, and thus distributing food is considered to be the highest social service.

Pause for a while. Think deeply!!!
Is ‘Hunger of the belly’ the only problem?? NO!!
By satisfying belly, can one be fully satisfied?? NO!!
Are all those, having no shortage of food, contented?? NO!!
They are also distressed and stressed.

In reality, the real problem is ‘Hunger of the heart’. Unfortunately, a person spends his entire life chasing after something…from birth till his last breath, he wants just one thing..  but he just does not understand, rather does not even try to understand, what he actually wants!

Heart is hungry for JUST ONE THING- Happiness, Änanda! And the ultimate expression of Happiness is LOVE- we want to love someone, and to be loved by someone!!! Each of us wants to be with someone with whom we can share our heart, share our feelings. Isn’t it?? Nothing less than love can ever satisfy anyone. This is actually the essence of life.

Running away from Love –

The root cause of all problems is ‘lack of love’.

Right now, we are simply running away from love. Some end up becoming alcoholic, some become workaholic. Some become drug addict, while some take up smoking. We must understand that with these things, the loving tendency cannot be suppressed or annihilated.

Very commonly, we equate money, success, fame etc. with happiness. We feel when we will have these things, we will be happy. This is illusion!

Had this been the reality, all rich and successful people, famous personalities etc. would have been happy! But, on the contrary, we very often find rampant use of alcohol, sleeping pills etc. among high class people. This is because one does not really know what Love is.

Love is…

Love means giving, not gaining. In love, there is no demand. Love is not of this world, for in the material world, everyone simply wants to squeeze something or the other from others (be it money, body or respect). Husband wants to squeeze love from wife; kids want to extract love from their parents and vice versa. This is NOT Love. Only by giving, one gains…and gains many folds.

Who wants Love and Why?

One may wonder who actually wants Love.

Does this body- eyes, ears, nose, hands etc. want love? Does body’s atoms and molecules want love? No!!

The soul living inside the body actually wants love. This is because soul is the part and parcel of the Lord-

mamaiväàço jéva-loke
jéva-bhütaù sanätanaù
manaù-ñañthänéndriyäëé
prakåti-sthäni karñati
(Bg- 15.7)

Lord always searches for Love and so we, His aàsas, also want love from every moment.

A jéva actually not just only wants love, he wants ecstasy. He wants to experience the limitless love which happens between the Lord and the living entity. And this ecstasy fully satisfies all the innermost desires of the heart. It is also stated in Çrémad Bhägavataà-

sa vai puàsäà paro dharmo
yato bhaktir adhokñaje
ahaituky apratihatä
yayätmä suprasédati
(S.B. 1.2.6)

Deep Loving Relationships satisfy Loving Propensity-

The Lord and so is the jéva have an inherent Loving Propensity, and till this Loving Propensity is satisfied, no matter what a person does, he is going to be miserable. His life is going to be miserable. This Loving Propensity cannot be suppressed or annihilated. Are we really trying to satisfy our Loving Propensity? Ask yourself!

How are you trying to fulfill your Loving Propensity? By money? By sex? The reality is one can maximum fulfill his desires (and that to some extent) but one cannot fulfill his loving propensity by these things.

The loving propensity can be fulfilled only by Deep Loving Relationships. One who is not having deep loving relationship in life, his life is meaningless. And to cultivate that, Kåñëa and Guru should be the centre of life.

Deep Loving Relationships can be possible only among devotees. This is because material person always remains under the influence of modes of material nature. And, according to the predominant mode at any point of time, his desires also changes. So, it is impossible to satisfy his ever-changing desires, thus loving material person is impossible. On the contrary, devotees always remain the same, and thus only they can be loved.

Human Form of Life : Golden Opportunity BUT…

Only in human form of life, the fullness/completeness of life can be experienced…the ever-desired love be attained. The activities- eating, sleeping, mating and defending- are possible in animal form of life also, but relation with the Lord can be re-established only in human form of life.

But unfortunately, it is commonly seen that despite attaining human body, a person continues to remain engrossed in animalistic activities, and thus remains bereft of Love.

Stubbornness is one of the reasons why a person remains devoid of Love. He fails to believe that he is a soul, servant of the Lord and therefore only by giving, he can be happy. He spends his entire life in trying to take- money, respect, body etc.- from others. He feels that by satisfying his false ego, he will be satisfied. This is Illusion.

Another reason because of which one remains devoid of love is his ignorance. Out of ignorance, a person tries to search Love in the material world and in material persons. In other words, he constantly tries for impossible and remains distressed. There is no Love in the material world and in material persons. Material world is actually a stage where everyone simply tries to exploit others for his/her own selfish interests. It is the blunt truth of life that in this world, in the entire universe, in all the galaxies, no one is interested in anyone- be it husband or wife, father or mother, brother or sister. Everyone has only one interest of how can one’s own motives be fulfilled. But we all overlook this reality and so our lives remain miserable.

I Love You…REALLY???

 ‘I Love You’ is the fake statement spoken by everyone every day. To say I love You, one should know who is ‘I’, who is ‘You’ and what is ‘Love’.

‘I’ is soul, ‘You’ is also soul and ‘Love’ means giving.

Does anyone of us say ‘I Love You’ to others in this consciousness?

Does anyone say ‘I Love You’ to us in this consciousness?

No!!

If someone does not know who he really is, he is mad, how can a mad person love someone? And how can mad person be loved?

It is a very big illusion that one thinks he loves his parents, kids etc. or his parents, kids etc. love him. The reality is no one loves anyone. Everyone simply loves his ego ‘my’, ‘mine’- my father, my wife, my kids etc. In other words, person does not love a wife, he loves ‘his wife’; he does not love kids, he loves ‘his kids’.. one loves anything and everything connected to him only.

To end the search of Love-

  1. In order to actually attain Love, one should deeply meditate and contemplate on-
  • His own svarüpa (he is a spirit soul, meant to serve).
  • Svarüpa of the Lord (Lord is Happiness Personified, Love Personified).
  • Svarüpa of the material world (There is no Happiness, no Love in the material world).

But a person cannot understand these on his own. Only in the association of devotees, these Tattvas can be clearly understood. So, one should associate with sadhus properly.

  1. After understanding, deeply meditating and contemplating, one should ask oneself the following questions daily-
  • Who are the most important persons of his life?
  • If he is spiritual, how can matter satisfy him?
  • (i) Which area of his life is out of control?

(ii) What are the probable solutions?

  • Can his desires be fulfilled/satisfied by money? (society has made him money making machine)
  1. Love means giving. Thus, most importantly one should engage in services of devotees, the representatives of the Lord. When one gives, humility arises and one comes to the platform of zero expectation.
    This Humility is the gateway through which one can enter into Spiritual Love- ‘the Land of Love.’